Monthly Archives

July 2020

Fandom

Why I’m Saying Goodbye To J.K Rowling

j.k rowling

I’ve mentioned both on social media and on a recent blog post about my feelings on J.K Rowling. I thought I’d sit down and actually chat about why I’m going to be saying goodbye to her after 20+ years. Some of my views might be obvious but this is sort of therapy for me too.

Hopefully this post will make sense so bear with me.

Why am I saying goodbye to her in the first place?

That’s a loaded question and the picture above should give you a vague idea. For years I had a rose-tinted outlook on her due to Harry Potter. I could only see the boy wizard in front of her and the odd charity she associated herself with. My mum was one of the first people to realise that something was wrong with J.K Rowling’s views and ideals. It wasn’t as obvious back then but it did get me thinking.

It wasn’t until I saw the first of her transphobic tweets that I realised how bigoted my ex-hero really was.

I do understand that people have a right to believe what they want to…inside their head. What I don’t understand is why they think it’s okay to use those views to hurt and damage those around them. I’m still utterly baffled when it comes to any sort of hate crime. Whether it be racial, gender-orientated or religious, no-one should have to harden themselves against attacks.

It isn’t right and shouldn’t happen.

I’m so proud of the friends I have surrounded myself with over the years.

They are the strongest people I have ever known and I have so much admiration for them. They are different, they are determined and they are powerful. I didn’t even know that I was making friends with unique sort of people until the last few years.

I don’t see disability or other things people might percieve as ‘not the norm’. I see people who love Doctor Who, write amazing fanfiction and love the same things I do. Do I judge them because they’re transgender? No, I don’t. Do I question them about it? No because it isn’t my place to question them. If they know deep-down that they’re meant to be a girl/boy, then that’s perfectly with me.

I’m more than happy to use the proverbs that they want me to use.

Why?

It’s their life and they shouldn’t have to have someone else’s view shoved down their throats.

I won’t lie and say that I didn’t cry when I saw how utterly wrong J.K Rowling’s views are. One of the things about being autistic is that we have something that we’re a little obsessed with. It could be Disney, Lego, trains or, in my case, Harry Potter. Harry Potter has been my life for decades. It’s how I met the majority of my friends, it’s how I got the confidence to take up acting and it’s why I loved to collect anything Potter.

That’s been tainted.

I won’t be leaving the Wizarding World because, as soon as she wrote the final word in Deathly Hallows, that world was no longer hers. It was ours. She created it but we brought it to life and we’re not going to allow her to destroy it. She is nothing more than our Dolores Umbridge and I refuse to let her win.

Here are some transgender charities that deserve all the support. Instead of buying any of her books, donate that money to them.

Goodbye J.K Rowling. I hope you learn from the mistakes you’ve made and the hurt you’ve inflicted.

What are your thoughts on the whole J.K situation?

Lifestyle

Productivity Hacks That Will Make Life Easier

productivityPhoto by Carl Heyerdahl on Unsplash

There is something that sometimes goes hand-in-hand with being a stationery lover and that is productivity. That and stationery is pretty! Haha! I have a folder on my Pinterest for all things productive and it’s one of my favourite boards on there. It contains all the thinkings of people smarter than me.

My favourite things to pin are night routines, tips for girl bosses and motivational podcast ideas. I’ve really gotten into podcasts lately so you might see a post about them in the future. Our lives have lost all sense of routine so, hoping that life is ever so slowly getting back to normal, we’re trying to reset. The best way to do that is by having a feeling of productivity in our lives.

That’s why I have some hacks that might help you work as your best self!

Block your time out

You know how when you were studying for exams, you set aside times to do certain subjects? Well, at least some of you might have! We can still use that mindset for our work now. Make a list of all the things that you need to do that week and block out certain times of your day dedicated to the thing. Just one.

You don’t want to ‘bite off more than you can chew.’ Our brains can easily get overloaded by doing multiple things at once to save time.

By doing this, your mind can give that thing its full attention. You can do this with blogging, workouts or even taking yourself out for a walk.

Create a dedicated workspace

Don’t do what I do and work from your sofa.

Though, in my defence, I don’t have anywhere else to work and the wi-fi is better close up! If you can, try to create a place in your home where you do your work. You can have a desk in a corner of a room where you won’t have any distractions.

You can still make it pretty! Pop up some quotes, photos, items close to reach and all that fun stuff. Pinterest is literally full of desk ideas. I have my eye on a desk from Ikea that I pop all my things on. Finally…a place for all my stationery!

Do short bursts of work

I’ve watched/read about people that literally sit down for hours and work. While I appreciate that you get the work done, you could hurting both your physical and mental health. Some people can only work focused for around 10-20 minutes at a time while others have conditioned themselves to work a bit longer.

According to The Medium, there is a technique called The Pomodoro Technique. You basically take away anything that will distract you and work fully focused for 20-25 minutes. You follow this by a 5-minute break and go back for another 20 minutes.

That way your brain is going ‘UGH! I’M SO BORED!’

Stay away from social media

I know, I know! This is literally impossible for most bloggers since social media is basically tied to our souls.  However, if we’re going to get any work done during our blocked time, stay away.

Yes, that even means during your breaks.

There are other things you can do during it such as going for a walk, stretching or even have a quick dance to music. Nothing like having a dance to one of Taylor’s new tracks! She has so many epic ones!! Just try to stay away from your phone and your laptop for a brief while and give yourself a moment away from technology.

Snuggle your pet!

There are so many other productivity hacks out there for you to choose. These were only the ones that I personally try to incorporate…if my brain lets me.

What techniques do you use to help stay productive?

Lifestyle Mental Health

5 Ways To Reset For The Upcoming Week

One of my favourite type of vlogs to watch on Youtube is looking at how people prepare for the upcoming week. They’re so much fun to watch and you get some amazing ideas on how to reset. There are a bunch of things you can do to get you ready for a brand new week! Whether you do nothing at all or try to get as much done as possible, it’s still your Sunday. Self-Care Sunday!

Let me know what you guys do to prepare for the week. I’m nosy, okay?

Tidy rooms

This isn’t something I always do on a Sunday.

It tends to depend, as everything does, on how my mental health is doing. There are days when I can stick on Spotify and get things sorted. Other days, I’m lucky if I can even do the dishes. I think there is a saying that ‘a tidy house makes a tidy mind’ and that is so true.

A big trigger of my anxiety is being untidy. I’ll be honest and say that I do have an okay flat, but I do tend to have piles of different things on my sofa. I accumulate it all during the week and I don’t have a lot of storage. If I keep it close to hand, I’ll be able to grab.

Tidy around and you’ll start the week all clean!

Do nothing

It’s a little contradictory that this one is doing nothing but yeah…do nothing.

Our weeks are usually pretty hectic (ignoring ‘Rona) and we don’t always have time to sit still. On Sundays, we can. Well, most of us. If you work Sundays, I admire you greatly!

What better thing to do than have a Sunday reset.

Reset yourself – mind, body and soul. Do some yoga, catch up on sleep, watch some Netflix and chill. They say Sundays are meant to be a day of rest!

Do some self-care

If you are doing nothing, that means you have time to self-care. I’m so guilty of not looking after myself any day of the week and it’s a serious problem. Maybe that’s why I watch so many videos. I’m living my best life through these vloggers!

  • Put on a face mask
  • Paint your nails
  • Have a nap
  • Read

Meal-prep for the week

Since we’re having a reset and preparing, why not get some meals cooked for the rest of the week? That will take one thing off your to-do list.

I’ve tried a couple of times to meal-prep but I’m still trying to find the best things to cook. I’m super indecisive especially when the weather is warm. I hate cooking when it’s super hot outside! People get hangry for food, I get hangry for being a freaking tap!

Create a plan

My favourite for all things to do during all this chaos!!

Life has been so unpredictable this year and I’ve hated it. All the things we were supposed to do went the metaphorical window and left us all with cabin fever. I’m hopeless when it comes to doing nothing since my brain doesn’t switch off. I have to be doing something!

That’s why I try to create a plan on my reset day. I write down all the things I want to do/need to do during the upcoming week and make a list. Which things are super important and need to be done earlier in the week, which can I delay to later in the day…

What things do you do to reset for the new week?

sunday reset

Books

Review | The Times I Knew I Was Gay by Eleanor Crewes

The times I knew I was gay

MY RATING: 5 Stars

On According to Daisy, it’s always Pride Month! We had my review on Loveless (ace character), Bookish and the Beast (has LGBTQ+ characters) and now we have The Times I Knew I Was Gay! I didn’t know that this was coming out untl 2 days before but I was still super excited!

As evident from my non-stop mention of Heartstopper every other post, I love a good graphic novel! When I saw Alice mentioning this on Twitter, I knew I had to check it out. This is actually a non-fiction book in the form of a graphic memoir which is awesome.

I love hearing about someone’s life story but I think Eleanor Crewes’ story is vital right now. There are some horrendous stats that I’ve heard about the LGBTQ+ youth and everyone needs to understand. If it takes at least one person reading this novel to not feel alone, then all the kudos!

Synopsis

Ellie always knew she was different. Contrary and creative, she wore black, obsessed over Willow in Buffy and somehow never really liked boys. As she grew, so did her fears and a deep sense of unbelonging. From her first communion to her first girlfriend via a swathe of self-denial, awkward encounters and everyday courage, Ellie’s journey is told through tender and funny illustrations – a self-portrait sketched out from the heart.

The Times I Knew I Was Gay reminds us that sexuality is not often determined by falling in love with others, but by coming to terms with oneself; that people must come out not just once but again and again. Full of vitality and love, it will ring true for anyone who took time to discover who they truly are.

Review

Where do I start with this amazing book?

I guess the first thing that I immediately loved was Ellie’s illustrations. They reminded me a little of Nick Sharratt (the guy who illustrates a lot of Jacqueline Wilson’s covers) and I loved that so much! The amount of detail that she put into her drawings is so cool!

They might be in black and white but that takes nothing away.

You can see all the expressions going through her mind along with the words. It’s one of the reasons why I love reading graphic novels. The pictures only bring the words to life even more especially when the moments get serious. As you can imagine, this book has a bunch of those and it really made me feel!

Some of the moments that I both adored and sometimes cried at were:

  • Seeing Eleanor starting to notice she was different to her friends.
  • Seeing how she started to realise that she was gay.
  • Learning what she felt she had to do to keep her secret hidden.

I will say that there are quite a few triggering moments for those who had/who currently have an eating disorder. I wasn’t really expecting it and it did shake me for a while. Everything that Ellie said about herself is what is going through my head right now. Even thought I was triggered, I also felt like I connected with her even more. I know what it’s like to be different from others, what it’s like to try and change yourself and how that damages you.

There is one paragraph in particular that has really stuck with me:

“…But my struggle with food was a subconscious way to redirect myself from the fact that I was gay.

I created a problem to distract my body from my brain, a pastime fuelled with anxiety, but one that was easier to reckon with than any of my deeper, truer feelings.”

It really describes what I’m going through at the minute. If Ellie does get the chance to see this review one day, thanks for being so honest about what you felt. There are plenty of funny and happier moments about accepting that it was okay to be gay and discovering herself. Her disastraous first few days after coming out, cutting her hair short and when she found her girlfriend.

It’s so cute!! I was throwing internal confetti while I was reading those moments!

It’s doesn’t matter who you are, whether you’re in the LGBTQ+ community or not, The Times I Knew I Was Gay will speak volumes to you.

Books Fandom

Review | Bookish and the Beast by Ashley Poston

bookish and the beast

I received Bookish and the Beast from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

With this being the 3rd in the series for Ashley Poston, I pretty much squealed when I discovered I could read ‘Bookish and the Beast‘ early. Ashley really knows how to talk to a nerdy fangirl like myself with all her fandom references. This book wasn’t any different and I thoroughly enjoyed it!

If you can’t tell from the title, this book is loosely based on Beauty and the Beast. A tale as old as time? Most definitely but an incredible modern take on it!

We follow Rosie Thorne as she tries to make it through her senior year of high school as sane as possible. She’s dealing with college applications, living in a small town and the persistent advances of a guy wanting to take her to prom. You can’t help but feel sorry for her! While all this is happening, she ends up meeting film star Vance Reigns who is particularly salty!

He’s hollywood royalty who has been banished to this town to hide from bad press. He’s moody, bratty and not a massive fan of reading. However, he has a secret that ties both he and Rosie together. Like Beauty and the Beast, Rosie ends up trying to ‘tame the beast’ by getting to know him and seeing the real side of him. If you love enemies-to-lovers, then you will love this!

Rosie was such a perfect Belle and her friends were incredible, especially the sassy Quinn! They are non-binary and wanting to take the role of Homecoming King/Queen for themselves! I love that there is LGBTQ+ representation in Ashley’s books!

There’s such a small moment in the book that I really related to and that’s why Rosie and one of her friends are fangirling over a new trailer. I did this SO many times with Harry Potter and Marvel that it really made me smile. Honestly, I think everyone should read this series because they’re all connected in small ways and my fellow nerds will definitely relate to a lot of what happens.

Bookish and the Beast is coming out August 4th so preorder now and enjoy!!

Bookish and the Beast

Books

Review | Loveless by Alice Oseman

Loveless

MY RATING: 5 Stars

If you have been following my blog for a while, you know that I’m a major fan of Alice Oseman. As you can tell, I’ve got a small yet mightly collection of her books. I need to own them all but just taking my time! I’m addicted to her writing style and the way she touches upon the LGBTQ+ themes.

I literally haven’t loved characters as much as these. I might even love them more than Harry Potter! *shockhorror*

Her books are so relatable for so many reasons. Heartstopper follows two school boys in secondary school and made me relive some of my school horrors! Haha! Solitaire has one of my favourite characters of all time in it: Tori Spring!! She is the big sister of Charlie from Heartstopper and she is so freaking sassy! I love her! Seeing as I love Alice’s books, it’s no surprise that I had to preorder her newest book: Loveless!

It’s actually her book birthday today so HAPPY PUBLICATION DAY, LOVELESS!

Synopsis

Georgia has never been in love, never kissed anyone, never even had a crush – but as a fanfic-obsessed romantic she’s sure she’ll find her person one day.

As she starts university with her best friends, Pip and Jason, in a whole new town far from home, Georgia’s ready to find romance, and with her outgoing roommate on her side and a place in the Shakespeare Society, her ‘teenage dream’ is in sight.

But when her romance plan wreaks havoc amongst her friends, Georgia ends up in her own comedy of errors, and she starts to question why love seems so easy for other people but not for her. With new terms thrown at her – asexual, aromantic – Georgia is more uncertain about her feelings than ever.

Is she destined to remain loveless? Or has she been looking for the wrong thing all along?

Review

The book follows Georgia and her friend Jason during their first year at Durham University. Ever since she was at school Georgia had loved love. She had loved the romance in the Disney films and read slash fanfictions like Draco/Harry and Korra/Asami. The idea of loving someone and dating them seemed amazing to her, but the reality of it was that it grossed her out.

She was eighteen and had never been kissed.

I literally have never connected with a character like this before. I mean…I’ve had a couple of characters that I’ve connected with like Luna Lovegood, but sexuality is a whole different thing.

You rarely see characters who are asexual or aromatic and, yet again, Alice brings it to life. Ever since I’ve read her books, she has shown so much understanding to the LGBTQ+ community. Whether her characters are gay, bisexual, transgender or more, she gives life to them and her fans.

As we follow Georgia’s journey towards identifying her sexuality, what that could possibly me and how it would affect the people she was close to. She has her best friend Jason who is super close to, her roommate Rooney who seems to love sex, Pip who seems like a closed book and more. I love all the references to Scooby Doo and the fact that they’re all in a Shakespeare society! MY PEOPLE!

What I particularly adored about Loveless was the different types of love.

It isn’t just one shoe fits all! It can come in so many forms: romantic love, family love and platonic love. You can really feel some of Alice’s personal experiences of being aromatic asexual. We throw the word love around so easy these days! At least I do! When I say that I love someone, I genuinely do! I care so much for my friends and they are my world. I just don’t feel the need to go past that!

Hugs are good though! ALL THE HUGS!!

So much happens in Loveless that both break my heart and had me giggling for ages! If you want to know more about asexuality or the LGBTQ+ community, click here! They’re amazing!!

Have you ever read any of Alice Oseman’s books?

Find me on: Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

Lifestyle Mental Health

How Much Should We Really Share Online?

Share OnlinePhoto by Patrick Tomasso on Unsplash

Over the last couple of decades, our prescence online has reached an all-time high! More and more people are using it to capture moments, share memories and following people they love. It’s crazy how addicted we have become on sharing everything and anything online.

From a baby’s birth to saying goodbye to drooling over food, we share it all.

I never realised how much we share online until I started thinking about it. While it’s easy to focus on the positives of social media, it got me wondering: do how much do we really share online? There are so many out there with power to ruin our entire online experience and sometimes even our lives. They troll, bully and blackmail with the info that you’ve put out there.

I promise I’m not trying to put people off using social media once it’s pretty vital to a blogger! I’m just typing out loud, that’s all.

No matter which social media you use (Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Youtube or Pinterest), there is always the possibility of being targeted. As a blogger, we’re in the unique circumstance of sharing our lives online. There aren’t many jobs/hobbies that do that (right now) and it’s something that we’re slowly starting to learn more about.

When I was 11, the internet didn’t even impact my life at all. I didn’t even own a computer or a mobile phone.

The only time I got to use a computer was at school and, even then, it was rare! We had a computer corridor we got to use every now and again and the screens were black with green writing. I think they were Acorn ones and the only excitement I got was playing a game called Castle of Riddles!

As I went through school, social media became more and more apparent. People were learning what selfies were, they were texting more and doing poke wars on Facebook. It wasn’t until I was leaving school that I was introduced to Twitter and I fell in love. It was so much fun seeing what your favourite celebs were thinking or doing. I wouldn’t say that I became addicted to social media because  my mum had already set a limit on online time.

2008 was when I started to write and share more of my life online. I fell in love with a website called RupertGrint.Net and actually joined them as a news poster at one point. I’m still friends with one of the girls who ran the site (hi Steph!). It was writing on this website that introduced me to writing posts of any kind and I fell in love. How could I have not known about this world sooner?! Eventually I discovered the downside of how much we share online.

I started to hear horror stories of girls being groomed by men, teens driven to suicide by trolls and data being leaked. Just those 3 things stopped me from sharing as much as I did. I deleted where I lived and just gave the county, didn’t give me my proper first name until a few years ago and wouldn’t post local pictures. Even to this day, I don’t even follow local accounts out of fear that people will track that.

Now that we literally share everything online, it’s scary! How much do you think we should share online? I’d love to hear your thoughts, especially from my blogger friends!

Do you think we’re now at a point where we should be more careful or are we fine as we are?

Fandom Lifestyle

Why I Changed My Blog Name

Why I changed my name
Photo by Allie on Unsplash

Well, it’s been a hot minute since I’ve written a blog post! It has been over a month and I’ve missed you guys! If you didn’t notice I’d ducked out for a while, then no worries. I just decided to take a break away from blogging and social media to focus a little more on my mental health. I also wanted to look at the direction I wanted to take my blog next.

I’ve had the blog name ‘TheDeeWhoLived’ for nearly 3 years and, while it was amazing to have it, I knew it needed to go. I think all the news about J.K Rowling and her archaic views finally put a nail into that nerdy coffin.

Don’t get me wrong…I’m still utterly addicted to Harry Potter! It’s my magical world! J.K may have created it but we have built it. It’s our world now regardless of what she thinks.

It really knocked me for six when I saw what my favourite author was talking about and that’s what tainted my blog name. TheDeeWhoLived just didn’t feel right anymore. I couldn’t hold onto this Harry Potter name anymore. I actually wrote a letter to her offline to get all my thoughts and feelings onto paper. I have way too many transgender friends who have been affected.

Now you’ve probably seen my new name ‘According To Daisy’ and are probably wondering what the inspiration behind it is. That’s always something I think when I see a blogger changing their name! Haha! I could easily have come up with a detailed reason but I don’t have one! I chose this name because these posts and opinion are according to me!

That’s it.

Simples!

The next thing you’re probably thinking about is whether my content will stay the same. The answer is partially. I’m still going to write lifestyle posts because I really enjoy chatting about my daily thoughts, but I also want to venture more into my first love: fandom. I stepped away from writing more of these posts because they didn’t get much interaction but now I just don’t care.

I have too much fandom love to give so won’t stop myself anymore!

I’m still trying to figure out exactly what fandom content I want to create, though I have some fun ideas. I just want to put back the fun into blogging again. Putting so much pressure onto myself is what triggered my mental health in the first place! I’m never going to get thousands or even hundreds of views. I’m just too quirky but I can still post. If I enjoy what I blog, then that’s the most important thing.

I’ve also archived my old Instagram with all the Harry Potter content. Again, I will still post some Potter pictures but I want to include the other fandoms I love. If you can’t handle all the nerdiness, then fairdo. I can’t wait to introduce you to all of the things I love:

  • RWBY
  • Disney
  • Books/Reading
  • Anime
  • Doctor Who
  • Chronicles of Narnia
  • Lord of the Rings

It’s true that I’ve lost over 100 followers on Twitter since I changed. At the end of the day, it’s their choice whether they want to follow or unfollow. I can’t keep people around and I never want to force anyone to. I’m starting afresh and that means new people to discover and potentially collab with! Who do you think would make a perfect collab match with me?

Can’t wait to start this new chapter in my blogging journey and take you along with me!

What do you think of my new blog name? Think I shouldn’t have changed?