After reading and commenting on my friend Jenny‘s post, I instantly got inspired to write about my own anti-anxiety bucket list. It’s such an incredible idea and something I need to tackle head-on this year seeing as 2018 was a little debilitating in regards to letting me do stuff. I’ve been diagnosed with anxiety since 2010 but apparently have had it since my teens. You can check out my mental health category for more of these kinds of posts.
My anxiety never really bothered me as much when a kid probably I was distracted by school and exams, but when I was at university, it decided to hit me full force.
Since then, it has prevented me from doing a lot of things that I have seriously regretted never doing: going on a holiday with a friend, interviewing someone famous, learning to drive and more. I sometimes feel as if it has trapped me back in my teens and refuses to let me do anything too crazy. Though I have tried to use it to my advantage whenever I’ve had to perform on-stage. It’s amazing what acting can do to help!
I tend to travel alone at the best of times but only to places that I’ve been to before such as London and Manchester. I would love to go somewhere for a few days such as Paris or Amsterdam where I’ve never visited but heard so much about. The idea of it terrifies me but I still want to eventually do it. Sometimes you just have to face your fears!
go out somewhere in the evening
This sounds like such a stupid choice but it’s a big thing for me. I always choose to do things during the day because I feel safe and I’m less anxious, but a lot of great opportunities happen in the evening such as plays, dinners out and events. I have always stayed clear of them because I hate travelling at night until I added it to this list!
be in a relationship
Okay, this is a massive confession that I’ll probably do a post on in the future…I’ve never been in a relationship. Never had a boyfriend, never had my first kiss…you get that point. I never really connected with anyone like that. Sure I’ve had crushes on people but that’s it. I did have one guy who had a crush on me but I was super uncomfortable and I did my best to avoid since I couldn’t return any feelings. I would love to experience what it’s like to be in a relationship even if it’s just once. I guess I feel like nobody can like me that way since I’m odd and different to everyone else.
It’s been 4 years since I last auditioned for anything and I miss acting so much that it hurts sometimes. The anxiety hits due to knowing I’m very rusty and my town has nothing in the way of acting classes. I do have a couple of possibilities in a city near me…I’m just really nervous that I’ll be terrible compared to everyone else. Stupid negative thoughts.
learn to swim
This post is quickly becoming a list of all the things I never did as a child but here we are: I, Daisy, cannot swim. Not even a doggy paddle! I can give a little kick with one leg but don’t even ask me to get the other leg up. I’m not getting any younger and I think it would help with a lot of body hatred I have if I could start swimming. I’ve been making a lot of excuses for not starting so that’s why it’s on here.
What would be on your anti-anxiety bucket list? Let me know in the comments below!